April 17, 2005
by: Ben Hawn

The 2005 version of the Holy Toledo Triathlon Challenge (HTTC II) was held in and around the eastern shores of Toledo Bend Reservoir, a few miles south of the town of Zwolle, LA.  The race format is 1 mile swim/40 mile bike/10 mile run.  I did last year's race, which was quite tough.  This year's was harder, with a hillier bike (25% increase?) and a few more hills on the run.

If you've never done one of Bobo Anderson's races, well, you might want to consider it.  It is hard to put into words why.  Bobo is a nut, a genius, and should be doing standup comedy somewhere.  As I have noted elsewhere, his pre-race talk alone is worth the price of the event.  He is a pro triathlete and sub 9:00 IronMan, so he knows endurance sports.  His stated goal here is to put on an "old school" event that one will be proud to finish.

Pre-race: I stayed at the host hotel, a decent, if overpriced resort.  Many participants camped out at the state park, a few yards from transition, probably a wiser choice.  With no in-room kitchen facilities, I was unable to partake of my ritual pre-race breakfast of two large bowls of oatmeal.  Being a bit short on excuses, I'll have to use that as why I had such a tough race.  Although the frat boys and their jail-bait dates, all in formal attire, did me no favors by partying loudly until 2:00 am.  The guy next to me in transition said he made sure to make significant extra noise at 5:00 am as a payback.

We went off on the swim in one wave of 40 or so.  All but one or two wore wetsuits.  Water was pretty cold at first, but fine after 4 or 5 minutes.  Somewhere around 70 or 72 degrees tops, would be my guess.  Last year we swam in a choppy rolling mess, so bad that several athletes chose not to even enter the water.  This year it was nearly flat.  At the first turn, maybe 400 yards into the race, I was last in the field.  This was at least consistent, as I was last in the field last year at the halfway point of the bike.  I swam the second half of the race stronger than the first and ended up third from the end, something like that.   My watch said 32 minutes and change upon exiting, so I make the swim course to have been a tenth of a mile or so short.

I had a quasi-epiphany in T1.  I have always had an admiration for the "real" cyclists.  You know, the ones who can take a leak on the bike during a race.  I have never done that, but maybe I am getting closer.  You would think I had fully relieved myself on the swim (Lord knows I had plenty of time to do so).  But as I was getting my bike gear in order the urge came, and well, I just let it go!  I had the super-tight, black, thigh length compression tri shorts on so it was about as discreet as it could have been.  I made sure I was on the grass so as not to contaminate anybody's else gear.  The whole performance probably rates a USAT penalty, but I imagine the statute of limitations has run out.  Shortly thereafter, I set off on the hilliest bike course I've ever done.  It's about 2 miles of rolling hills until the entrance to the resort, challenging, but not unreasonable.  Make a left and the fun begins.  Two more miles from the entrance to turnaround and not a flat stretch for any more than maybe 100 feet, if that.  I had a 25 tooth rear cog and could have used a 27.  There is nothing as bad as Sugarloaf Mountain outside of Orlando, the steepest hill I've ever climbed, but the cumulative effect of the 2 miles out and then 2 back is probably a bit more.  I hit 40 mph on the descents, feathering the brakes.  A real man would probably have gotten close to 50, maybe beyond.  After completing the four mile circuit, it's a left and about 16 miles to the turnaround south of Zwolle.  This portion of the course takes place on a marked bike lane with only one intersection of note, the 4 way stop at Hwy 6.  Road quality is excellent.  There are a few flat stretches, and some rollers.  I was thinking I could maybe keep it in the big ring for the entire 32 miles, but no, I had to drop down to the small several times on the return portion.  The one (yes, one) pot hole on the course was well marked with paint, and its location had been explicitly defined at Saturday's pre-race meeting.  I still managed to nick the edge of it, nobody's fault but my own.  The course is out and back, so you must negotiate the 4 miles of resort entrance road a second time.  I had kept a little in reserve on the previous 32 miles, not getting our of my aerobic zone, according to my heart rate monitor.  I dropped down as low as 3.9 mph on a few of the climbs coming back, not far from the point where you topple over, but I did manage to stay upright and wheel back into transition feeling pretty good.  When I finished the last climb out of the resort entrance, which is possibly the toughest one, I said "Thank you, God" out loud, and meant it.  I did manage to pass 5 or 6 cyclists on the course, not as many as I would have liked, but what can you do?

I started the run with a bottle of cold water and a  couple of gels.  A slight uphill out of the state park, then a right on a gravel "road" to the lollipop.  First mile at 9:50 or so.  I was holding back, and this seemed about right, considering.  Second mile also 9:50ish, not bad considering there was a nature call during this one.  Refilled the water bottle at the mile 2 aid station, went a bit further down a flattish section of road (quarter mile?), then a left and here is where it gets bad.  The downhills are so steep that they are useless: if I had tried to run, I'd have tumbled all the way to the bottom, no doubt.  The uphills can be climbed "running", but barely.  After a half mile of this, with no respite, I took a right into the woods, along the power line right of way.  Hills here are as steep as the ones I just came off, but now you must watch your foot every time you plant.  Made it to the mile 3 marker just a little over 10:00.  Not bad, I thought.  Exit the woods after about a half mile, left on the resort parkway again, third time that day, but first time off a bike.  Refilled water bottle at station and proceeded to the turnaround, running most of the hills, but walking parts of the steepest.  Back into the woods around mile 6, where it's pretty flat for about 200 yards, which was quite a thrill.  Then the terrain reverts to form, and prior to the turnaround a mile away, one must traverse the three titled pits: in order they are, the Pit of Despair, the Pit of Mild-to-Moderate Depression, and the Pit of Less Joy, all appropriately named.  There are three miles to go after that last turnaround, much of which is along the trails, including of course, the three Pits again.  In total it's probably 4 plus miles on the trails and a bit less than six on road, but the proportion of climbing is about equal on both.  Total flat ground can't be more than 1/2 a mile out of 10.
 
I finished in 4:40 something, including a 11:10 per mile pace on the run. I was pretty pleased with that, until I saw the results later that day.  I don't know how anyone could average a sub 7:00 pace on that course.  My hat is off to you Andrew Kenworthy, that is unbelievable.

Thanks to all who worked hard to put on this great event for a too-small crowd (every one of whom raved about it): Bobo, chief assistant Jordan, mom-to-be Billie, cook and second place finisher John, Kyle, Brian, Jerry, Paul, Ilene and anyone else I have overlooked.  Put me down for next year!